Friday, September 22, 2006

BREAKING NEWS ON KURDISH-ISRAELI RELATIONS


"Somewhere along the line, many Americans relegated the media to a notch on the morality scale only slightly above that of child molesters."

~ Gregory Kane, Baltimore Sun, 1997.


Rastî has just obtained stunning evidence that proves, without doubt, that the highly respected journalists at the BBC have figured out how to use the Google search engine.

Wednesday evening it was revealed by the BBC that they had finally obtained proficiency in operating the world's premier search engine, Google, and created a sensation by revealing news from December, 2005. While it wasn't clear whether BBC executives were aware that the Guardian had reported the same news last December, insiders seem to hint that cub reporter and ace analyst, Magdi Abdelhadi, who broke the story on this nine-month-old news, has become one of the BBC's rising journalistic stars.

One BBC source, who wished to remain anonymous, told Rastî: "Magdi has certainly made a name for herself with our executive staff, as a result of her keen research and analytic abilities. She is definitely on the fast-track to bigger and better things--perhaps even investigative reporting."

When asked if she thought there were some inconsistency with the tone of her report about a Kurdish-Israeli relationship, given that Western countries, as well as many Arab and Muslim countries, have close diplomatic and political relationships with the Jewish state, Ms. Abdelhadi stated:

"As an ethnic Arab, I am well aware that many Arab or Muslim countries, such as Turkey, have close relationships with Israel. I also realize that Kurds are primitive, backward, tribal mountain-dwellers, who should not operate under the pretence of civilization on the world stage, thereby establishing political or diplomatic relationships with modern nation-states. Notwithstanding my own personal feelings, I am confident that I remain objective and unbiased in my reporting. It goes without saying that I am a professional."


When asked what her future plans were, Ms. Abdelhadi replied, "In the next year, I would like to become proficient in the use of Microsoft Wordpad. Gaining mastery over that utility will be a great career boost for me."

5 comments:

Nistiman said...

Thank you, Rasti for drawing attention to one of the shining stars of journalism, Ms. Magdi Abdelhadi.

While it goes without saying that I too was awed by the depth of her research and cunning ingenuity -- I mean, can other journalists expend precious time and energy in digging 9 months into the archives to re-hash an old story? -- I am also thoroughly impressed with the BBC for setting an insurmountable bar for journalistic standards.

I hope this means we can look forward to reading fabricated news from the BBC not too far into the future!

hiwa said...

Bigot BBC(BBBC)

The sad thing is I HAVE TO pay for BBC!!

Mizgîn said...

Nice to see you, as always, Nistiman. I hope your summer was fruitful.

In addition to this nonsense from the BBC, I am astounded at the gullibility of the blogosphere in not picking up on the fact that this "report" is ancient history. The same goes for the sudden interest in the KDC advertisements recently, because that was also last year's news.

I predict that in the next week or so, the BBC will report on the Hindenburg disaster, explaining that it was a joint Kurdish-Israeli sabotage operation.

Hiwacan, I suggest that you DEMAND a refund :P Seriously, what in the hell does this journalist at BBBC care if there is training from Israelis? BBBC is certainly not concerned about Kurds, neither are all the bloggers who have made stupid comments about this ancient history.

You have brought up the point of the spending of a lot of money for this training. As far as I'm concerned, that's a legitimate point, especially since we know that basic services and job opportunities in South Kurdistan suck for the ordinary person.

I would prefer to see the money go for the improvement of life for the people. I have no objection in theory to any relationship between the KRG and Israel (or with any other state), but like everything else, we must examine any relationships to make sure that they will benefit the people.

philip said...

Recall that that BABC (British Arabian Broadcasting Corp)sees the entire world revolving around a triangle from Riyadh to Baghdad to Cairo...the Kurds and the Israelis both threaten the priveleges granted to this unholy trio for many years by the Brit upper-crust Oxonian types.

Therefore the Beeb will leap on any story, true or not, that brings infamy onto one of these filthy upstart peoples who do not know their place...and go positively berserk to promote a story to harm both of them at once.

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